What's eating you?

Ever lie awake at night with your mind racing through endless “what ifs” and “should haves”? Stress sneaks into our lives, slowly piling up until it feels like a heavy burden. You might eat well and exercise regularly, but if stress isn’t managed, those efforts can feel pointless.

A simple story illustrates this perfectly. A professor holds up a plain glass of water and asks his students, “How heavy is this glass?” The guesses vary — 8 ounces, 12 ounces. The professor smiles and says, “The weight doesn’t matter. What matters is how long I hold it.” A few minutes? Easy. An hour? Your arm aches. All day? It becomes unbearable.

Stress works the same way. Worries about work, relationships, or personal setbacks may feel small at first. But the longer we carry them in our minds, the heavier they get — until exhaustion sets in.

Our bodies have a stress response system — the sympathetic nervous system — designed for short bursts of “fight or flight.” But chronic stress keeps it switched on, raising blood pressure, disrupting sleep, draining energy, and making calm hard to find. We aren’t built to carry stress endlessly, so noticing it early is key.

Buddhist teachings offer a helpful way to think about this: the story of the two arrows. The first arrow is life’s inevitable pain — illness, loss, hardship. The second arrow is how we respond — anger, fear, self-pity. We can’t avoid the first arrow, but the second is optional. Mindfulness helps us avoid unnecessary suffering by choosing to avoid the second arrow.

So, pause and ask yourself: What are you holding onto? Anxiety from a meeting, tension in your shoulders, regret as you fall asleep? Over time, the weight grows. Relief doesn’t come from solving everything — it comes from deciding when to let go.

You don’t have to pretend stress doesn’t exist or eliminate every worry. You can simply loosen your grip, give yourself a break, and let your body return to ease.

Awareness and self-compassion matter. By noticing what’s weighing us down, we can choose how we respond. Stress is part of life, but how we carry it is within our control. Practices like meditation, deep breathing, or mindful pauses can help us manage it with resilience.

So here’s something to ask yourself: What burdens am I holding that are quietly wearing me down — and when will Iet them go?